ain't no sunshine

it's not getting better like i thought it might. actually, it's worse and worse and worse. only one "creative" activity i can do is reading. i read all the time. about 3 books per week. i'm living lifes of characters from the books. it is much better than reality.

books which i read lately:

1. Touching Earth by Rani Manicka.

2. Pomegranate Soup by Marsha Mehran

3. Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See

4. Molekuły emocji by Janusz L. Wiśniewski (it is polish author. i just mention the title)

5. The marriage plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

and now i'm reading this one ---> Geek Love by Katherin Dunn

i wish i could write more, but i'm not able to. i feel speechless. like there's not enough words and too many thoughts in my head.

i don't know reality or fiction

what do i do when i'm bored? i draw. sometimes. i'm not very good at it but i'm gonna do it as long as it gives me pleasure. i thought that i might share some of my drawings with you. so here they come.

 

 Jack Skellington from The Nightmare before Christmas.

young girl. i like to think of her that she's a rich, but naughty one. ;p

 

some kind of leopard, i guess.

 

 Yoh from Shaman King. is there any anime fan, btw? ;3

 

it was supposed to be Ichigo from Bleach.

 

  

two pages inspired by Marina's song How to be a heartbreaker

 

and a page inspired by two songs

1. Marina&the diamonds - Radioactive

2. Imagine dragons - Radioactive

wolf.

and...

 Yoda! :3

That's all for now. have a nice day! xoxo

complexes

like it is said in post's title, this one would be about aspects of me that i'm not happy or proud about. lately, i'm getting obsessed with my weight. i wasn't thinking about it for a while but it came back. and now i'm feeling fat and ugly. ;_____; i must go on a diet. i've been searching for a good one for couple of days.
i was trying to lose weight on last vacation. it worked. i lost 5kg in 4 days.
so, i'm going to work on myself from monday. i'd like to lose about 7kg. wish me luck. i'm really gonna need it.

oh, and i haven't been writing for a while. i already have holiday, but a lot of things are happening. i'm planning to find a part-time job. and i've also started a new relationship this week. maybe it will get better soon and i'll be happier.

haha, i was supposed to write about my complexes and i actually ended on something else ;p

i don't belong to anyone

k, so i'm fucking confused lately. i really don't know what's going on with my life. i have a huge huge huge mess in my poor head. so i did something i'm pretty good at. i just run away for few days. i left Warsaw yesterday and now i'm at the countryside with my friend. we're staying at my parents' lovely cottage. i wish i could stay there forever and just pretend that nothing ever happend. sucks to be me, yeah.

 
some old pics of me and Pata <3

Marina and the diamonds - Homewrecker

blah blah blah

recenlty i'm not feeling well. it's probably because of the weather. in this week the weather in Poland is acting kinda crazy. at first it's really hot and sunny and suddenly it's becoming to rain. my head can't stand it any longer. i have a terrible headaches every day. 

but enough complaining. i'm preparing a party. me and my friends are gonna celebrate end of the exams. yeah, they finally end. i'm free! :3

i don't have any new photos so i'm gonna add something else

i want this soooo muuuch! on my  ribs at the left side. aaah, i need money. :<

Got different people inside my head

i'm totally exhausted. but i have only two more exams and then i will be free for next 4 months. what a relief! on monday and today i was having an oral exams, one from english and the other one from polish. i did my best in both of them and i'm very satisfied.
yesterday, i was at Pigeon's house. yeah, again. ;p i was practicing my speech for today. and Pigeon made me a cup of delicious hot chocolate. oh god, this girl is just too good for me. >3< btw, check out her blog --> http://pigeongray.blogspot.com/

Marina and the diamonds - Fear and loathing 

Feeling super! super! super! suicidal

Feeling like a queen

looking like a little girl

 

 Marina and the diamonds - Teen idle